The details do matter...

So, this past weekend I had the privilege to photograph a wedding for my friends April and Nate. This was a true honor seeing that I have wanted to do a wedding, and I love April and Nate and they like the photography I do. 

I was a little bit nervous, but I knew that it was going to be just great! Well, that was until I found out the details of this photography job. You see, I was not going to be able to take photos while using a flash during the ceremony- and the ceremony was very dimly lit. (For all you non--photographers out there, this is a problem) I have been to tons of weddings and have talked to tons of wedding photographers, none of them are willing to shoot a wedding without flash! This is because of the quality that will be produced is not going to turn out the best it can be.

Now that I have given you the introduction to my story- let me now say that I was freaking out days before this wedding. Having nightmares that the photos would not turn out. That things might be blurry and that I did not know what I was doing.

Isn't that interesting? I had a dream opportunity, to shoot a wedding, and 2 seconds later I was freaking out and questioning if I was able to take photos at all. This is not the confidence the Lord has given us. This is the doubt the enemy likes to stir us up with. Why was I so insecure? Because I did not know, to a "T" the details of my camera. All I have ever shot in was in the light, or if it was dark I used a flash. This is where God decided its time I go to the next level.

Always remember: Going to the next level always requires learning, stretching, and growing. These things all needed to happen. But really what God was showing me is that its not enough to just take a great photo, but to know HOW to take a great photo. To know THE CAMERA so well, that no matter what the circumstance is... you will still be able to get a great shot.

This goes with my relationship with him. I have always been one who is very practical when it comes to sharing the gospel. I know about God's love, I show it through my actions most times and not my words. But its about time I really need to start learning the DETAILS of the word of God. To know where and when God states that he loves us. I need to know the ways of fighting doubt and lies from the enemy... but I cannot do that if i do not know the details of the word of God. 

This is a simple blog, but it has been on my heart for a while. 

I did learn a lot about my camera this weekend, and I am so pleased to say that I took the BEST pictures at the wedding! But I still had a stretching time. I still needed to go through that challenge and learn the details. Because now, I am ready to take on the low light! 

So how about you? Are you ready to move to that next level? Where you fight the "low light" (doubts, fears, insecurities) of life. Its time to stop using a flash, to cover things up, or To get a quick fix, but its time to actually face and confront the enemy's lies with the word of God, with the truth written in the Bible. This is how you will come out with the absolute BEST you that God created you to be.

Last night, a women said something during worship, she said, "One of my worst fears is that when I die and go to heaven someday, God will reveal so much more 'good' that I had to offer, that I never even developed or gave away. To know I could have been better, but chose not to, to know I could have helped more, but didn't." What she said gave me the chills. It's true. Some of us hit a level that we are comfortable with, like me in photography. I was comfortable never shooting in low light. "just getting good shots in the day" but you know what... then God would never be able to use me in any other conditions that what I am comfortable with. This is the problem.

God gives us a choice to be all we can be. I say its like the disciples... there were followers of Jesus when he came to their city, but then there were the 12 who followed him from town to town. Even more than that there were the 3 that Jesus poured into, but there was still one who Jesus was intimate with and who ended up dying on a cross as well. This is how we are. Some of us reach a level that we are comfortable with and we stop. Some of us don't want to risk any more, give up any more or learn any more than where we are at. This will keep us from being all we are made to be.

As you live out your day today... ask God what he wants you to do, who is the best you are made to be, and what you need to do or learn to get to that point. I believe this life is about a constant growing and learning until we are taken up to heaven. Believe me, you don't want God asking you... "Why did you not be all you can be?" Because to be honest, the answer to that question only comes paired with Selfishness, pride or fear. 

My challenge: Be the best you can be. Get to that next level and learn the details of your walk with God- because yes, the details DO matter.

The search for dreams...

In this world, I am pretty sure everyone strives for a dream, or at least starts out life that way. In the book I am reading it quoted, "There is a natural desire in humans to push forward, to dream and to aim for something." This starts from when we are very young. This desire is what takes us from crawling to walking, from walking to running (so our parents cant catch us), from running to driving (YES!) and for some of us driving just isn't enough(Like me) we resort to flying!!! All over the world! 

This desire to dream, to strive for greatness is in all of us when we are young- because it is a God given gift! But then, as we grow older, as we begin to enter into the reality of our dreams, we begin to dream less and less. I guess thats where I am at. Before starting college I was dreaming BIG, going to AFRICA, wanting to live there! Then, 4 years of college set in and I guess I started to try to learn all I could and "get through" school. Now, my dreams are still there, I can feel them in my tears when I worship God, I can hear them when I pray from deep within my soul, and I can see them when I see photos and video of the world. 

My favorite class of all of ORU I took second semester, my freshman year called "Intro to missions and culture" with Dr. Smith. I literally cried every class, and most times so did he. He quoted that, "one of the problems we have as american missionaries is that we have passion for the world, but then when we are asked to devote 4 years to college to grab tools for the job, we loose the urgency of our dreams..." This I have found to be true. 

Another quote written in my Bible was during my missions training (ROPES) at ORU and it was said by one of teachers that night: "If medical students can devote 8+ years to save a human life, then why is it that we cannot devote 8 minutes a day to save a human soul? This is it my friends. Because dreams are not about feelings!!!! I have believed in my dreams because of my feelings for the past 20 years! This is what growing up is... remembering those dreams, and pursuing them! You don't pursue your dreams because you feel them.... You feel them when you start pursuing them! I bet Joseph could tell you that he wasn't "Feeling, crying and seeking" his dreams while he had to work his way through slavery. In fact, once Joseph was out of prison, it wasnt HIS dream he was able to think about... but he was then asked to INTERPRET the dreams of someone else (THE KING). What?!!? Thats not fair! If I were Joseph I could have surely thought God had forgotten me, and my dreams. 

You know, one of my favorite quotes from Dr. Smith is: "What if your purpose in life was to help everyone else achieve their purpose in life?" This is not what WE like to do. Humans, our generation, our youth groups, they all told us that WE HAD A PURPOSE!!! ME! I!! not you, well ok you, but I NEED TO FOCUS ON MY DREAM. This is sadly where I think we have lost the point, lost the vision and lost the purpose of our DREAMS. The purpose of our dreams is not to shove everyone away and focus on just what "we need to do", but the purpose of a dream is to be able to share with others, to be able to believe in other's dreams as much as you beleive  in your own. If we could all do this, imagine what our world could look like... But what if God forgets our dreams?

This was probably something Abraham thought when he had to sacrifice Issac. Being a newly wed, I can express that one thing Alex and I like to do is to dream about our family we will have someday. (This is more me than him! haha) In these conversations we look up names, and we joke with how many kids we want, ect. I imagine about every married couple does this at some point. This is part of the "dream of a family". This was a very heavy dream on Sarah and Abraham's heart. Even more than that, God told them, their dreams would come to pass. After a long time of waiting, and even some disobedience, they had a son. This was all they wanted! But then, God told Abraham to sacrifice his son. WHAT!?!?! God, you promised this son to him, and then, you want to kill him? How could you do that? Sometimes, at these points in life we wonder if God is just taking our "lollipop away" because he can. Abraham I am sure cried, prayed, sweated and questioned and doubted the whole way up the mountain to sacrifice his son. But it was not until the very LAST second when God knew Abraham would actually give up his dream (his son) that he not only stopped Abraham's sacrifice, but then blessed him beyond all measure! "and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me."Gen 22:18

At this point, this is one of the hardest lessons I have had to learn: Obedience. I was a kid, who learned by making mistakes. I am not proud of this, but it is who I am. I usually could not watch someone else get burned, I had to feel the fire for myself to understand the heat. But over the past 4 years, disobedience has a larger consequence then it used to. Sophomore year, I was going to go on a trip with some friends, and I wasn't feeling that "right" about it. But I figured I would go anyway. This was one time in my life where I HEARD the voice of God say to me, "if you go, I will not give you the man I have for you." Now, I never say "God told me..." unless I am very sure he actually did tell me something. In this situation, I spent the whole weekend alone, unable to go on this trip because I did not want to disobey God. On the very last day of that Labor Day weekend. Bitter, sad and doubtful that god "actually said that", I went and studied with my friend Alex Muirhead for the afternoon. 5 hours later... I realized the purpose for me staying. Your dreams success, depends on Your obedience to GOD.

So in all.... we need to Desire to dream - DO NOT BE AFRAID. 

then, remember the Urgency of our dreams is at hand - DO NOT DOUBT.

But not get mad when the Lord wants to INTERPRET THE DREAMS OF SOMEONE ELSE- DO NOT BE SELFISH. (pride destroys dreams)

Because ours will come as we also believe in the dreams of others- BE GIVERS.

Realize who's dream it is: Gods- be ready to give it up for him. - SACRIFICE

Your dreams success, depends on Your obedience to GOD.

Ask God to give you dreams, and if you have lost them, or if you have forgotten, draw close to him, because when you do... those will be there as well. He knows the desires of your heart.