This post could be somewhat of contradiction seeing as what I am writing- could apply to me having my own blog.
I have just arrived here in Jamaica and it is just as sunny and beautiful as I remember it to be. The people are ready to take you for all your worth, they are rood and pushy and the drivers are crazy... but there is still a overwhelming sense that the Lord loves Jamaica and the people who live on this island.
To give a little background of Jamaica, as I learned in my African American History class at ORU, Jamaica was a holding island for the slaves between the middle passage. After enslaved and captured in Africa, the British held most slaves here on this island, breeding and training them for slave work as they were to be sold all over. After all of the slave trade ended... we now have a people group who live on this island who are free physically, but not culturally.
The people here are kind, sweet and love to have a good time. But they also have to look out for themselves, they are full of fear and they need to have a "title" so they feel ownership or leadership of some sort. But as I look around, and as I hear them needing a title, needing to beg for food, needing to push to get what they want...I also see a little bit of that in me. When I feel my world is moving out of control I too try to control the outcome by moving things around and by looking for a title or a position to fulfill this emptiness inside. As I look around facebook I see people all around me doing the same thing! My dad calls it "Brag-updates" instead of status updates and it is true... this generation feels that we are the "Star of our own show". I feel that way all the time. I am trying to figure out what I NEED TO DO. Where MY POSITION IS. How I AM GOING TO SUCEED. These things are not intentionally bad, but they are selfish. Even worse, I feel that everyone needs to know what that position is.
I very much struggled with the idea of what Alex and I are supposed to do here, What we can do, what we need to get done, ect. This trip is not about me. This island, these people, this world will go on without me if I were not here... So if its not about us, why are we here? Well, God does need us here. But he needs us to be fully surrendered to him. To serve HIM. Tonight, a pastor spoke and he said, connecting with others is what we are called to do. But we can not and will not have a true connection unless we are listening. Connecting is about figuring out what others need from you- not what you need from them. Missions, work, relationships- not what they do for you, but what you can do for them. In this, you will find true joy. The verse I read today said "Give to the poor, so that they cannot return the blessing... in this, you will be a true blessing and you will be rewarded by God, not man." (Paraphrase)
Serving others without needing recognition, giving without wanting to receive anything in return. Using your facebook status not to boost your reputation but to help others, connect others or encourage others instead. This trip has already hit me in the forehead because as I have asked God to speak to me, he has... about the things in me that are holding me back from what he has.
Tonight- Look into your heart- see what you have to offer the people around you. Your mom, dad, siblings, neighbors, friends, co-workers, ect. Because in the end... you are going to realize the show was not about you... and you really weren't a part of "The Real show" (God's Show)... cause you were focusing on your script, not his. In the end, you do not want to see all the faces of people who needed you but you didn't show. You do not want to hear the promises that you broke to God and others read aloud... you do not want to know that you didn't measure up to all you could be..... do you?
This is for me... because as much as I travel, and serve... I am NOT THERE YET- I have let God down time and time again. And tonight... I am putting down my script and picking up the script of our Lord Jesus Christ. Even if I only make the background... I want to help others into the light- and in this, God is well pleased:)
Love you all! Goodnight!
